November 9, 2022 – Help! I’m Homeschooling a Teenager

Hey, Mama!

Gena Suarez, Publisher of TOS

In Good Times and Bad, Be Available

Hey, Mama,

What happened? You made such progress last week. And now look at you. This week has been a disaster. Someone needs to sit you down and have a long talk. Because this just can’t continue.

1. Your kids giggled WAY too much. Why are they so happy, anyway? They could be doing math worksheets instead of wasting all that time chatting with you (and laughing so hard).
   
2. Your house is messy again. Just look at that floor. Were you raised in a barn? Your son spends a LOT of time engineering complex structures with Legos; that’s not normal. He’s too nerdy. No one’s gonna wanna marry that someday.
   
3. Your husband seems too jolly. You must be hiding something. No one has such a light heart after being around their kids all day. So why is he so playful around you? NOT normal; I don’t like it.
   
4. Your house is light. It’s happy. Your kids are engaged; you’re always talking to them about something, and they seem to want to be with you. In my household, that’s not normal.
   
5. Your daughter acts like she’s 21+ years old! But I know she’s 14. So why does she act like a responsible adult citizen? And why do all the little neighborhood kids follow her around? That’s not normal. Why don’t you let her enjoy her teen years? There are some good body-piercing/tat shops in town; stop being so conservative, or you’ll lose her. It’s not natural to be so meddling, you weird helicopter mom.

Mama, the above is absurd, so roll your eyes and chuckle. What YOU are doing with your children is the most natural method there is. Parenting, loving and raising kids, spending time, and prioritizing what’s important (cleaning is nice, but building relationships is nicer).

And if your young teenager is acting out, you can handle it. I realize sometimes the heart-to-heart talks that you have with your teens may seem pointless, useless, and a waste of breath. The expression on their faces when you are imploring with them to follow Christ, and to not fall into the same traps you did when we were young can be discouraging. It’s not falling on deaf ears, Mama, because His Word does not return void. Be faithful, speak the truth in love.

Plant the seeds. Plant, and plant some more. Be available. Keep that communication open, even if they act indifferent. YOU are the Mama. Later, they will remember your words of LIFE and TRUTH. Plant away. Water and tend. God is faithful to harvest.

Here’s some additional wisdom from homeschoolers like you at The Old Schoolhouse® Magazine.

Growing with Teens by Sheila Campbell
Homeschooling the TEEN Rebel by Deborah Wuehler
Teaching Teens to Read with Discernment by Amelia Harper

Those who look at you funny now are also still on their own path, learning as they go. Be available because your confidence in your journey is intriguing to them. They may want to talk, later.

Whether it’s your teens crying out for help with their rebellious ways, your neighbor seeking counsel, or the homeschool mom in your co-op who is drowning and needs a listening heart, my advice to you is the same: be available. 

It’s a full life, Mama. And the closer you are to Christ, the more needed you will be, because we live in a dark and dying world, and the lights are dimming more and more. You are a light for Christ and people will be drawn to you. Be available. And pray that the Lord will help you prioritize your time. He is so faithful to direct. So turn not to the left or to the right; it matters not what others think of you or the way you raise your family and use your time. You are doing right, so walk confidently in that, as you follow Him. For now, Mama, His hand is ever on your head.

~gena

The Last Chance Detectives are back with new adventures. These books are perfect for 8–12-year-olds that love mystery and solving the case! https://www.tyndale.com

Todd Wilson

Familyman Ministries

You Haven’t Ruined Your Teens

You know the great thing about God’s timing is that He knows exactly when we as parents need to be encouraged. Usually, it comes after we’ve been in the parent trenches for a while, battling it out on the frontlines day in and day out.

Like most (read – ALL) moms and dads, we look at our teenagers and their behavior and think, “We’ve failed. We’ve ruined them. Where did we go wrong?” Sometimes we get so discouraged that we can barely see straight.

And then it happens . . . like a cool spring of water to a thirsty soul, God encourages us in just the right way. Sometimes it happens when you see a large group of kids or teenagers at the mall, a museum, or a park. They’re acting cool, talking trash, and being as wild as jungle animals. Or maybe you overhear one of your teens saying something thoughtful or unselfish to a sibling that makes your heart smile.

It’s as if God says, “Keep trying, your teens aren’t as bad as you think.”

He doesn’t have to encourage us, but I guess He knows we need it, and He is good to give it.
For that I am thankful . . . and you should be too.

Be Real,
Todd

About the author

Todd Wilson is a husband, dad, grandpa, writer, homeschool conference speaker, and former pastor. Todd’s humor and down to earth realness have made him a favorite speaker all across the country and a guest on Focus on the Family. As founder of The Familyman and The Smiling Homeschooler, his passion and mission are to remind moms and dads of what’s most important through weekly emails, podcasts, seminars, and books that encourage parents. Todd, and his wife Debbie, homeschool four of their eight children (the other four are homeschool graduates) in northern Indiana and travel America in the Familyman Mobile. You can read more at www.familymanweb.com.

Roger Smith

Pillar of Knowledge
Roger Smith – Don’t Be a Firefighter!

W.B. Yeats said, “Education is not merely the filling of a pail, but rather the lighting of a fire!”

This, my favorite quote, comes to life in teens and preteens. Lighting the fire and fanning the flames within is both a privilege and a responsibility of the parent.

Our education must go beyond information, providing inspiration that gives meaning to information, gives interpretation and application to facts, gives light and hope to dreary data.

What is inspiration? Leading another to think in possibilities, causing one to think the world and others become different because of them, helping others see their use of time matters, and leading them to discover their purpose in life.

“For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus unto good works, which God hath before ordained that we should walk in them.” (Eph. 2:10) Teens must find that path ordained beforehand—that purpose for their lives. Homeschool parents can help them find their way rooted in unique gifts, insights, abilities (and disabilities).

Assign a report, “What do you hope to see changed in the world?” No matter how ludicrous, wicked, or surprising the answer, don’t be shocked! Simply follow up, “What do you need to know to help that happen?”

Then watch for a flicker of desire. Trust your heavenly Father to guide your child’s growth as you fan the flame.

About the author

Dr. Roger Smith is a family doctor in rural Louisiana, where he and his wife, Jan, raised four adventurous children who are all grown, making their own mark in the world. He speaks and writes on parenting issues and produces brief videos that can be found on Facebook @ParentingMattersNow.

With the abundance of technology around us, it’s easy for our teens to be constantly “plugged in.” However, we don’t want them to be disconnected in their real-life relationships. We know they simply want to know who they are and where they fit in. The Disconnected: Connecting with Teens in the Digital Age course at SchoolhouseTeachers.com examines the challenges teens face and explores the ways adults can interact with them during these tumultuous years.

This is a must-see video program for parents, teachers, and mentors who want real-life connections with virtually connected teens!